EDITION OF WEDNESDAY, APRIL 5, 2017 (PetPowellPress) -- Good luck, Tony Romo. You haven’t heard? The ol' Cowboys signal-caller is going into broadcasting. So, Mr. Romo, if you have some spare time, how about becoming a spokesman for the new spay/neuter campaign in Dallas.
Here’s your script: “Hello, Dallas. I’ve played with some impotent teams that couldn’t produce. But now it’s time to call the right signal for Dallas dogs and cats. Huddle up for spay/neuter. Alright everybody, let’s cut on hut!”
May need to be toned down, but you get the point. A leader on the field ought to be able to rally the team to a winning effort in Dallas. First, of course, he’ll have to get the attention of the offensive players in Big D’s fertile game of ignorance -- and they ARE offensive. [PERSONAL TESTIMONY: For you people who fear that "fixin' my critter" will change your friend's behavior, don't be a dope. It won't reduce the love for you at all. Example? That is Deputy Chief Kittie Leigh Johnson, spayed for years, and as you can see, still an affectionate cat who, given the signal, will cuff you and read you your rights in a split second. That's the story, anyway.]
TWO FROM WILMER
These dogs have been on the “help” list at the Wilmer Animal Shelter for more than a week. The mission-driven Laura Macias is trying to help get animals out of the small shelter just south of the Dallas City limits on I-45. Sammy and Sara are a couple of young Lab mixes who need a safe route to a new home or new homes.
To ask how you can help, call or text 214-949-2726 or email firstname.lastname@example.org.
MEANWHILE IN DENTON
Our Denton shelter contact Amy Poskey is, no doubt, hoping to get to express the joy of another “WOOOOHOOOO MOMENT.”
First, someone is going to have to rescue Aiden. Amy writes, “As you can see, he has some hair loss and we believe it’s Demodectic mange. He has not been vetted or tested with other dogs due to his condition and has been put on ‘hold’ until he starts looking better but that could take weeks. Bless his heart, he is the SWEETEST boy and cries for attention! He LOVES playing in the play yard with his toys, too! We think Aiden is a 2-5 yr young Cattle Dog/Husky mix but it’s hard to tell with his hair loss. However, we KNOW he is a diamond in the ruff and all he needs is a loving home where he can heal and enjoy being the bowzer he was meant to be!”
[LARRY ASIDE: Sorry, I had to take a time-out because of Amy’s line “diamond in the ruff.” Made me howl, so to speak.]
So, OK, get this dog out of the shelter and get some doctorin’ going on the dog. Mange is the most needless curse for canines. Easy to cure. Just get a mangy dog and add money. And it’s worth every dime. Here are the contacts: email@example.com, firstname.lastname@example.org, and/or email@example.com. Also, email firstname.lastname@example.org. Call the shelter at 940-349-7594. It’s at 3717 N. Elm St. in Denton.
QUIET CONTEMPLATION: At the end of our street, on the other side of Polk at Ledbetter, there is a shopping center that is usually quiet. It has a dialysis clinic. Some other quiet businesses.
For the past two nights, the burglar alarm in the center has been going off. Piercingly. Who knows why? My theory? Someone comes in at 8 in the morning and turns it off, then when the staff leaves at closing time, this lonely alarm begins echoing its irritating mating call through our usually quiet neighborhood.
This sort of thing has happened at least twice a year for the past five or six years. There’s probably a record somewhere.
You know what an all-night burglar alarm can do? It can run birds out of a neighborhood, make cats a nervous wreck, keep dogs on irritable alert and, pardon my entirely justifiable French, bleep off humans so thoroughly that they think about hiring a lawyer to get a restraining order. [LARRY ASIDE: That is my board-certified litigator cat, The Senator, who still has privileges in Washington, D.C. As The Texas Clawer he has suggested a lawsuit alleging income-damaging disturbing the peace or at least alienation of affection with a pillow. I’ve considered. Not all that fond of the pillow, though.] But, in the end, you know what I do? I call and leave a nearly sweet, informative and kind message at the landlord’s number. Sometimes I send an email to the listed “address.” No threats, no nastiness -- heck, they didn’t set off the alarm. There is no legal solution to get immediate relief. And, after a while, a local burglar will simply say, “Let’s not go there, I can’t stand the noise." Then another one replies, "On the other hand, nobody pays attention to the alarm any more anyway. I'll get the crowbar and a couple of bags.”
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