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Conversations with the unemployed

Our buddy, spectacular golfer, keen technowriter, excellent hardworking colleague and all-round swell guy Doug Bedell has created a discussion board for folks who were cut loose on the sea of life by the Great Media Ship. Oh, yeah, Doug's one of us, too.
(From the corporate side, it was spun as a critical reduction in force, but from the reduced side it felt like the Great Newspaper Massacre of 2004. In analyzing this "business model," I think I remember hearing something like it before way back in the 1960s: "We had to destroy that village to save it." So, my fellow ex-DMNers, we'll all simply be spectators to The 21st Century's Great Newspaper Experiment. That may not be all bad.)

Anyway, Doug's theory is that if all the ex-DMNers see how the other ex-DMNers are coping, it might just help us all cope. Coping begets coping. I think it's Biblical. And that's appropriate, seeing as how the situation calls for a certain amount of damnation in the hereafter.

Here's the link to Doug's discussion board:

www.tboneinc.com/webbbs_config2.cgi

Remember, be as polite as you feel is appropriate. Be as kind as you think is necessary.
And be thankful you don't have to adjust to the time change Monday morning. Ah, the silver lining in this dark cloud on our lives. Hug your kids and your spouses and loved ones and pets -- they matter.

Sunday morning walnut surprise and Saturday Mutts

Happy Halloween and enjoy the day without scaring yourself. As I write this it’s either early on Sunday morning or an hour later than early on Sunday morning.
My napspouse Martha is comfy in a recliner. She’s asleep under a print afghan, Benchley the tortoiseshell cat and, appropriately for Halloween, I guess, Annabelle Bob the black cat.
I, however, am wide awake and, as I type, watching TV. Important news story on, you ask? Sensational breaking news about the giants of our times -- the Survivor contestants or the keen businesspeople on The Apprentice? Heck, no. I’m watching the cable network TV Land because they’re showing my favorite Dick Van Dyke Show episode, “It May Look Like a Walnut.” It’s the one where Rob and Laura go to sleep after being scared witless by a horror movie on TV. Rob awakes and discovers that Earth has been invaded by walnut-loving people from Twilo led by Kolac, portrayed by Danny Thomas. (I‘m unsure of the spellings -- I’ll have to look them up in the Encyclopedia of the Alien Universe.)
I remember as a kid being terrified by a film called Not of This Earth and another named Invasion of the Saucermen. It probably didn’t help that we lived in an un-air-conditioned home and had to keep the windows open for ventilation and I convinced myself that monsters were going to reach through the screens and get me. This may be the source of my insomnia, doctor. …. Well, time to get off the couch and review our swell Saturday!
Martha and I had a great Saturday. We went to the Mutt Masquerade at Stratos Global Greek Taverna (www.clubstratos.com) in Dallas. Dawn Rizos, who with hubby Nick, owns and operates the restaurant, set up a giant tent with dozens of round banquet tables covered with white tablecloths, black napkins, exceptional centerpieces (round plots of tall grass with tennis balls and dog toys). It was kind of high-toned but appropriate for regal mutts in costume!…..Piano genius Steve Hulse had flown in from Atlanta to help Dawn put on this benefit for Operation Kindness (www.operation kindness.org). Steve's nimble as a cat on the keyboard and when he touches the keys, music comes out -- he's a cool cat. … (I’ll do more on the totally entertaining dogs later -- Martha has some photos we’ll post once she adjusts to the time change and awakens back on earth.)
We didn’t bring a dog to the event -- we knew Dawn had arranged for a big revival-sized tent and Vera the Chihuahua likes nothing more than to wrap her leash around a tent pole and yank. She’s prone to dramatic hijinx.

An update: The Dick Van Dyke episode has ended with Rob and Laura in their pajamas and in their individual twin beds separated only by what was probably a pretty lamp in 1963 when the episode was filmed but what in 2004 looks like a glowing trashcan on a creosote post.

Back to the Mutt Masquerade: Dallas City Council Member Steve Salazar was there -- he spoke briefly about the economic upsurge in the area around Stratos. Laredo Bank is there now. Restaurants are thriving. Traffic is high. And, as the council member noted, the area has been the beneficiary of a municipal redistricting so that it is served by a single council representative that has only its interests at heart rather than being divided among 5 council members with fragmented focus.
Andy Allen of the Dallas Animal Shelter Commission sat with us and had her two sweet older dogs dressed as Animal Services officers -- Andy was dressed as a cat and claiming to have been caught by the officers! She’s a great animal advocate and a hard worker for such causes as shelters and spay/neuter programs.
And Greg and Carol Autry were there with the legendary Loco, the little dog who was blinded by some fiend several years ago and became the driving force behind Texas’ stronger anti-cruelty law, the Loco Law. Loco’s former canine companion, the loveable Boston Terrier Pooch, has gone on, as animal people say, “to the Rainbow Bridge.” Greg and Carol have a new companion for Loco, a tiny Chihuahua named Sweet Pea -- Sweet Pea, who has only stubs for back legs, is as congenial as a politician on the day before election.
More on all this later. Mister Ed is on TV now. I was half-watching while typing and my brain thought, “They’re showing a political ad.” But, no, it’s just a show about a talking horse -- the camera’s focusing on the front end of the horse, so as soon as I turned to look at the TV I realized that it wasn’t a political ad.

Sleeping late, reunions and metal detectors

I just watched a commercial in which one of the lines is “sometimes it takes people a little time to wake up to what’s new and improved in the world.”
The sad part: I watched it at 6:30 a.m. on Saturday. That would mean I saw it by accident. I was accidentally awake. For a change, I disturbed the dogs and cats. My snoozespouse Martha is so patient with me.
You’d’ think I’d be able to sleep late on a Saturday in my “new and improved” life, wouldn’t you?
No reason to rise, just keep on sleepin’. Hah. OK, I had a dream about the office. I suspect this was brought on by the fact that last night I saw that the former employer’s website (www.dallasnews.com/pets/) posted one of the two remaining Pets & Their People features I had in the can before I was, indeed, canned on Wednesday. I’m glad they published it -- the people in the story are great folks and shouldn’t suffer just because I didn’t make the cut in the News World Order. So, thanks to The Dallas Morning News for showing some regard for those folks.
I mention this to explain to folks who thought “laid off” meant “no more,” that in the newspaper business you can be tossed out one day and your work may continue to appear until the paper runs all of it. It’s sort of like communicating from the afterlife.
Now, let’s get on with something to smile about.
I got a note from Allen Wait regarding an item in my now-departed Metro column about a high school reunion. It was so nice, I thought I’d share it. He wrote, “Thanks to you for our mention in your column of Sep. 29. You dragged some folks out of the woodwork who had not responded to us before. As a result the Bonham High classes of 1948, 1949, and 1950 had its biggest and best lunch in over five years of trying. … On behalf of our three classes, thanks mucho. Allen Wait.”
It was a pleasure, Allen. I always encourage people to attend their high school reunions -- you’ll inevitably find something interesting and you may even discover how something you did decades ago touched a life in a positive fashion.
That congeniality may be what separates class reunions from family reunions. The cops have been called to many a family gathering, but I can’t remember the last time they were brought in to quell a disturbance at a class reunion. People come armed to a family reunion. We finally decided to chip in and rent a metal detector for the entrance at our family reunions. Nobody’s been shot in years. Of course, killing’s too good for most of ’em.
I might have made that last part up. I’ll find out if it offended anyone at our next family reunion. If we ever have another one.
Enjoy your Saturday. Nap when you have time.

Steak surprise

Ever spent a day at home without having your attention occupied by fighting the flu or some other illness? You discover things. Like, there really is NOTHING on television -- well, there's the stray story about Osama Bin Laden making another tape. That's freaky.
I knew he existed, but I had no idea that door-to-door meat salesmen existed.
I was sitting here at the computer when suddenly the dogs went ape. I believe that is the proper scientific explanation: the dogs went ape. (I'll have to check my "Darwin Handbook of Transformational Animalisms")....
Anyway, parked at the end of my cracked and crumbling driveway was one of those little white pickups. In the bed was a big ice chest and on top of it, was a set of longhorns. I don't know how fresh.
The driver stayed in the truck but the helper hopped out and walked up to the front porch while a chorus of angry dogs tried to bark their heads off. (I swear it might happen. I keep SuperGlue handy.) The angriest canine was the 8-to-10 pound Chihuahua-mix, Vera. And she only has about six or seven teeth left. Her bark really is worse than her bite.
I stepped onto the porch and the man asked, "Would you like to buy a case of steaks?"
Now, I've been asked many things on the front porches of life. "Would you get off my porch?" is the most common. And "Will you sign for this?" comes next. And I've had politicians stop by to deliver a load of something else on the porch.
But, "Would you like to buy a case of steaks?" is a new porch question for me.
"No, thanks," I said, then explained, "I'm a vegetarian."
I know he thought the dogs would like some steaks but he might have been afraid I was going to say, "Why, bring 'em on in" and the prospect of standing in a living room with a box of steaks while surrounded by a handful of angry dogs must have killed his entrepreneurial spirit.
He got into the horned pick up and rolled away.

Red lips and tango

Good morning and I'm happy to see you.
This is a nearly pre-dawn posting here in the Central Time Zone. I'm trying to show that I can get up early and work each day -- just in case a job comes open at a dairy or at an egg farm.
In the meantime, my wishesshecouldsleeplatespouse Martha is preparing for her work day. She has a large dog who likes to sit and watch her put on her makeup. And because Martha is keen on hijinx, I'm surprised Hambone the Big Dog doesn't get a nice pair of big red lips each morning. But lipstick on that dog would be gilding the lily.
We hope to see lots of you and your dogs at the Mutt Masquerade (11 a.m.-2 p.m. Saturday) at Stratos Global Greek Taverna. We'll be helping with the contests. This event benefits the no-kill shelter Operation Kindness in Carrollton. (Catch the details at www.operationkindness.org.)
I'm sure there are other animal-related events upcoming and I'd be happy to mention them here. Just e-mail the info to this blog and I'll reach as many people as possible. I'm sure the size of the reading audience is reduced as the week ends, but this is not the first time, it turns out, that we'll be reaching fewer people than we thought.
Our attention this week has been diverted by the unexpected circumstance of unemployment but this blog will not become a whiningsite. Still there are, as the lawyers say, "true facts" at play. My brain, weak though it may be, was conditioned to think "column" for nearly 20 years. Before that my first decade at the "paper of my recent departure" was spent as an editor. I've gotten encouraging notes from many reporters I formerly edited. I'm proud to say the notes were well written and properly punctuated. And I got misty-eyed reading them.
Lots of people in the big American sprawl from Washington State to Washington D.C. sent me great letters with such good things and wonderful sentiments.
Interesting how the mind functions when there's no real need to do so. During one discussion with a correspondent, I found myself promising, out of gratitude, to send her a "box of kittens." Then I added the instructions, something like, "when the box arrives, simply open it and carefully add another litter of kittens, then seal the lid and send the box to a friend. Call it a 'chain litter.' "
I hope someone laughed at that. I read it to Inky the Cocker Spaniel, but it's too early in the morning for him to do anything but yawn and go back to sleep. He knows I’d never seal a kitten into anything but my heart. Honest.
At any rate, before we bring this entry to a close, let's remember to urge all of our friends and acquaintances to spay and neuter their animals. (Cost isn't a problem-- go to www.metroplexanimalcoalition.com and check out the Patt Davis Spay-Neuter Program.)
People need to keep their critters properly confined (for the animals' safety, especially in a sprawling metro area where there are plenty of cars and way too many mean people).
You should also keep your animals properly socialized by painting big red lips on them each morning and teaching them to tango. Oh, wait, that lips/tango stuff shouldn't be in here. Poirot the Cat was at the keyboard while my attention was diverted.
Never paint big red lips on your dogs and cats. The dogs don't really notice, but the cats prefer a more subtle shade. Both will tango if the mood strikes.
Enjoy your day. I just realized that next Monday morning, I don’t have to worry about adjusting to the time change. How about that. Another positive to being out of work.

The new life begins

Whew. What a day that Wednesday was.
It began with me wondering how in the world I would have time to get two columns and some blogging done, then write a feature about pets and people and it ended with me wondering if I'd ever work again.
"RIFFED." Or maybe "RIFed." I'm not sure about the correct form but I do know that it stands for "reduction in force" and in the minds of the people who perform it, it's completely different from "sacked" or "canned." In the eyes of the people upon whom it is performed, it still works out to "out-of-work." And isn't that a swell place to be. Oh, my.
Yes, 29 years at the same place -- would have been 30 in June -- and suddenly I don't have to hunt for a parking place on the crowded company lot. I don't have to wonder if I'm going to be called into a time-consuming meeting just as I begin typing enthusiastically on a story I'm enjoying. I don't have to iron a shirt to go to work. .... You get the drift.
Nope, today I awoke wondering about just what service to cut -- phone, cable, etc. You know -- the things every American has a God-given right to have. Well, every employed American.
My unemployment will spread the misery. The cleaners will have a less-frequent customer. The credit card company will have a clerk who is idle -- if they don't still have clerks, they'll just have a robot whirring and doing nothing. Money that would have been distributed to other people and businesses will no longer exist -- in my pocket, anyway. Someone else is getting to keep it and, of course, I wish them the best. All the best -- may that money be needed to help cope with their own interesting things.
Oh, I have plenty of work to do around the house. Things I've put off for years until I could get time. Ha. Joke's on me. I've got time. But if I screw up a repair job, I don't have the money to correct my mistake. You'll noticed I haven't spent every day as a skilled tradesman.
Fortunately, my wonderspouse Martha still has a job with a sensational company. So, the dogs and cats got breakfast today. As long as all that holds together, we're OK.
Except that I'm jittery already. I can't imagine life without going to the office. I used to imagine it. Now that it's here, I can't imagine it.
Lots of my friends got the axe, too. You could put out an excellent newspaper with the people who got their walking papers Wednesday.
Oh, there was no appeal. I guess that's the frustrating part. No higher court to argue your case. No place to state evidence that you were always a hard worker who didn't cost the company unplanned expenses and who didn't dishonor the profession.
See, that's the sort of loopy thinking that sets in. I'm writing scenes for a play that will never be produced. It is imperative that I remember that whatever happened yesterday is over and done and that now I must focus on a completely different future.
It feels like a broken romance. You daydream that you'll find the right phrase, the right example of devotion to change the heart of the target of your adoration. I think this is the nutty, nutty part. Unrequited love.
The trick is convincing yourself that you're still the kind of person with whom another company -- maybe a prettier one -- could fall in love.
Relax, I know I'm not the first person to whom this RIFfing -- what IS the proper construction of that term? -- has happened. It's just that I'm new to having to cope with this and I'm a tad dazed.
I must tell you this, however, Martha was a splendid comfort to me yesterday. Lord, what a woman you created. Smarter, tougher and kinder than I am.
We tried to carry on somewhat normally. In the Cloud of Stun, we motored out to Arlington for opening night of the 22nd Annual Book Fair of the American Association of University Women (Arlington Branch). And we bought several books at a half-dollar each. We saw our friend Diane Feldman and other folks from the AAUW and their enthusiasm for that book fair -- it runs through Saturday and raises money to help women. They lifted our spirits. Heck, buying books always lifts our spirits.
And when we got home, we had the dogs and cats for additional comfort. You can get a lot of solace from a nicely coiffed cocker spaniel who thinks you're a genius because you can open a can.
I sat on the couch for a long time -- I didn't lean up against the arm of the couch because that was where Hambone had chosen to sit. Hammy is the Great Dane/Lab mix -- 100 pounds of casual demeanor. But he has his ways. He's a good sitter -- likes to sit on the couch or in my big green chair (now his big green chair) and watch TV until he nods off like an old man (we're so alike).
The dogs and cats seem to be a bit surprised that I'm still at home today. Whoa. Aren't we all.
In case you wondered, I've written something every day of my life since I was a kid. Might have been a paragraph, might have been something longer than a diatribe (however long that is...)
As Barney Fife used to say on The Andy Griffith Show, it's a "compelsion."
People kept telling me Wednesday that when one door closes, another one opens. I just hope they're not depending on me to keep the door maintained. I've seen and held screwdrivers and pliers -- I'm just not really sure how they're supposed to work at peak efficiency.
I'm going to go ask Inky the cocker spaniel. He seems to have some answers and if he doesn't, he'll nudge Hambone awake and bark, "I can't do anything with him. You talk to him a while."

Well, here I am now

I'm hoping some of you pet bloggers and others have found your assorted ways to this site.
I just got laid off by The Dallas Morning News, but that doesn't mean I don't have enthusiasm for helping people. I just may not have money to help much.
Still, we're all in this together, except for some of us, I guess.
Now, I'll post animal items here as I can. Meanwhile, if anyone knows of a good job for a fairly congenial fellow whose still has some moves on the ol' keyboard, why, let me know. I'm available for work.
thanks,
and glad to see you,
larry

Cloud's back home

Though the alert to hunt for Cloud went out Saturday morning, it turns out she was "found" about 11 p.m. Friday. Someone "left her" at Equest, near her home in Rowlett, and it was the next day before she and her buddy Larkin could get back together and resume their agility routines, winning second place in a meet. So, there's some good news.

There's a crisis in the world of Sheltie Haven, the rescue group that specializes in the beautiful little dogs. Cloud, an agility dog that works with a little girl, 8-year-old Larkin, managed to slip out of her yard Friday morning and disappear near Lake Ray Hubbard -- in the area of Stonewall Road near Vinson Road in Rowlett. I'm told Cloud and Larkin currently show in the "excellent" level of agility and have been together for three years. (Call 972-475-9253 if you know Cloud's whereabouts. You can see a photo of Cloud at www.sheltiehaven.org -- click on "lost" and Cloud's the first dog, a striking beauty.

An idea for a Dallas area fund-raiser?

Oh, I know we have plenty of good ideas for fundraisers around here, but here's one that came to me via e-mail and I figured that you folks who work hard for the animal money might get a kick out of knowing about it. Tickets are $45, but it's not the modest price that is the big attraction. It is the passion of the dance -- and seems to me I recall seeing a pug one time that was dressed as a belly dancer...And, frankly, I haven't heard a dancer from the Washington area mentioned by name since Wilbur Mills and Fanne Foxx tangoed into the spotlight -- and that was so long ago that it's either hidden in the archives or a mere paragraph in history books.

Here's the news release as written by the folks from the late Cleveland Amory's organization:

" “DANCE FOR A CAUSE” HELPS THOSE WITH PAWS

Fund for Animals To Host Celebration of Middle Eastern Dance (“Belly Dance”), Culture and Animal Rights

SILVER SPRING, MD (October 21, 2004) – The Fund for Animals will host a unique gala fundraiser on Sunday, October 24 at Casablanca Restaurant featuring dancing by Samara, the internationally recognized Middle Eastern dance star, a fantastic vegetarian Moroccan feast, live music starring Arabic musician Hicham, and the DC-area’s finest dancers. All proceeds from this event will go to support The Fund’s animal advocacy efforts.

WHEN: Sunday, October 24th. Doors open at 6:30 p.m.

WHERE: Casablanca Restaurant, 1504 King St., Alexandria, VA

"It is a rare occasion that a person has the privilege of combining two passions. In this case it is dance and animals,” said Jessica Michalski, the organizer of the event. “Samara has been a long-time animal advocate. She and all the dancers in this event are generously donating their performances to our cause.”

Samara has become one of the most celebrated and sought after Arabic dancers of today and has performed with the internationally acclaimed Near East Dance Group at prestigious venues such as Lincoln Center and the Kennedy Center. She has been involved with animals since a very early age when she started rescuing stray animals, and has been a vegetarian since she was 13.

The Fund for Animals was founded in 1967 by best-selling author and humanitarian Cleveland Amory."

Rock on.....if that's a proper thing to say. We didn't have belly dancers in Texarkana when I was a kid. ... that I knew of, anyway.