Steak surprise

Ever spent a day at home without having your attention occupied by fighting the flu or some other illness? You discover things. Like, there really is NOTHING on television -- well, there's the stray story about Osama Bin Laden making another tape. That's freaky.
I knew he existed, but I had no idea that door-to-door meat salesmen existed.
I was sitting here at the computer when suddenly the dogs went ape. I believe that is the proper scientific explanation: the dogs went ape. (I'll have to check my "Darwin Handbook of Transformational Animalisms")....
Anyway, parked at the end of my cracked and crumbling driveway was one of those little white pickups. In the bed was a big ice chest and on top of it, was a set of longhorns. I don't know how fresh.
The driver stayed in the truck but the helper hopped out and walked up to the front porch while a chorus of angry dogs tried to bark their heads off. (I swear it might happen. I keep SuperGlue handy.) The angriest canine was the 8-to-10 pound Chihuahua-mix, Vera. And she only has about six or seven teeth left. Her bark really is worse than her bite.
I stepped onto the porch and the man asked, "Would you like to buy a case of steaks?"
Now, I've been asked many things on the front porches of life. "Would you get off my porch?" is the most common. And "Will you sign for this?" comes next. And I've had politicians stop by to deliver a load of something else on the porch.
But, "Would you like to buy a case of steaks?" is a new porch question for me.
"No, thanks," I said, then explained, "I'm a vegetarian."
I know he thought the dogs would like some steaks but he might have been afraid I was going to say, "Why, bring 'em on in" and the prospect of standing in a living room with a box of steaks while surrounded by a handful of angry dogs must have killed his entrepreneurial spirit.
He got into the horned pick up and rolled away.