ReadLarryPowell.com

Sleeping Loki; Waking Kinkster

How many of us have surrendered our furniture to a dog or cat? Yep, lots of us animal fans buy a big soft chair only to find out that, apparently, it wasn't designed for humans at all. Here's a case from the Western Slope of the Rocky Mountains.

We hear from Raechel Zamarripa that 2-1/2-year-old "Loki lives in beautiful Montrose, Colo., with a family of three and his best friend, Athena the Rottweiler." This photo captures sleeping dog Loki, a 165-pounder who stands 32 inches high, in a favorite spot.

He and Athena live with Raechel and hubby Steve and their 15-year-old, Joshua Zamarripa.

Raechel says of Loki, "Every morning he greets us with a smile and will talk to us. He tell us how happy he is to have been rescued. He used to be shy and afraid of men, but now is a bundle of confidence. He will run and jump with such grace and agility that you would never believe a dog his size could have.

"He loves to sleep on his pillows and on the furniture. 'With those huge lips I just love to squeeze, how could I say 'no'?

"Loki already had some obedience and will respect tiny baby gates. I would never have thought anyone would abuse or dump an English Mastiff."

There is a Texas connection. He was fostered by "a wonderful woman named Allison who "is from Austin...She is a volunteer with Friends of Rescued Mastiffs and so much more. She helped teach him some courage showed him the feeling of love."

Raechel says volunteers from Friends of Rescue Mastiffs helped transport him to Trinidad, Colo. Lots of Texans are familiar with Trinidad -- it's a waystation on the route from the hot Texas weather to the cool mountain air. Yep, lots of Texas gas money has been left in Trinidad.

Now back to Loki. Raechel says she met up with the volunteers in Trinidad. Loki "jumped in the back of my Explorer as though he knew he was home....My husband says his paws are so big that scientists have flown in from around the world to investigate possible Sasquatch activity in our area. On a serious note, they are about the size of a dessert plate! We thank Friends of Rescued Mastiffs for allowing us to know such a gentle giant."

Now, folks, here's how this sleeping dog affected a heart. Raechel writes, "I have since begun volunteering for the rescue group we got him from. We receive so many great dogs just waiting for someone to love them. We love Loki with all our hearts. Loki would like to thank Friends of Rescued Mastiffs and his foster mom for taking such good care of him. He is one great gentle giant with so much happiness and love to give."

Here's your chance to get involved with mastiffs. Go to www.mastiffrescue.org.

Remember, if you've got a great photo of your napping cat or sleeping dog, e-mail it to [email protected] with the usual journalistic info: who, what, where, when, etc. We're pretty happy with the response to this feature -- seems there are lots of folks who believe their critters are photogenic awake or asleep! Thanks to all of you!

ON THE CAMPAIGN TRAIL: Independent Texas gubernatorial candidate and author Kinky Friedman was at Borders Books at Preston Royal Friday night. How serious is his campaign for governor? Before the Kinkster sat down to sign books, the crowd heard from his campaign advisor, former U.S. Sen. Dean Barkley, the guy credited with getting Jesse Ventura elected governor of Minnesota. That makes it serious. The turnout also makes it serious. (www.kinkyfriedman.com)

The overflow crowd kept the candidate busy signing books for more than 2 hours.

In addition to being a musician and an author, the Kinkster is known for his work with the Utopia Animal Rescue Ranch (www.utopiarescue.com). Mr. Friedman is a fan of cats and dogs. I guess, then, it's appropriate that his campaign advisor is named "Barkley."

Before Kinky began signing things Friday night, he told the upbeat, adoring crowd, "I'll sign books. I'll sign posters. The only thing I won't sign is bad legislation."

Remember, as an independent, he'll need a petition drive to get onto the ballot. The drive can't start until after the major parties' primaries next spring. If you vote in those primaries, your signature will not count on Kinky's petition. It's a goofy law, but it is the law and those party politicians are sticklers about campaign law -- well, about campaign signature law, anyway. Don't bring up donations to the party folks.

And on the 10 o'clock news, we learned that Sen. Kay Bailey Hutchison WON'T run against incumbent Rick Perry in the GOP primary. This means either she didn't want to bust up the party -- what with One Tough Grandma Comptroller Carol Keeton Rylander Strayhorn considering the race -- or she got wind of the Top Secret Rick Perry Plan To Solve The Texas Education Crisis that'll be presented in the special session of the Legislature.

Now, being politicians, they'll probably all want to throw more money at education. But haven't we thrown enough money at it already in Texas? Let's quit throwing and start aiming. We've proved that money doesn't always translate into learning.

How about redesigning the methods of education. Go back to the 1950s without the racism -- when students had to grasp the basics of readin', writin' and 'rithmatic at an early age. That's the foundation of everything else to come in a classroom.

Kids -- especially the younger students -- need to love learning for the sheer joy of having the knowledge. That's nurturing -- unlike memorizing facts to combat the fear of failure on state-mandated tests. Love learning. How difficult can it be to inspire that in those fresh, young minds? Maybe the failure is that parents and loved ones don't know how to make learning a gentle top priority for kids. Maybe teachers are handcuffed by modern "rules."

Maybe a generation of kids beaten down by no pass/no play pressure CAN'T teach their kids to love learning. I don't know. I'm just wondering. But some districts with exemplary parental involvement and a sense of community never seem to have tragic results at testing time.

Maybe we need to get parents involved in their kids' lives -- "It's 10 p.m. Do you know where your kid is studying?" Make the purpose of school more than just turning out kids interested in "meeting expectations" -- make it full of fun and learning and hope for the future. We know this can be done. We've done it before. Some districts still do it.

As I once noted on this site, the Dallas school system has just 158,000 students but enjoys a TWO BILLION DOLLAR BUDGET. For that much money, we ought to see more a few more A-students.

I've gone over this passage several times. I can't tell you how nervous I am that I missed a spelling or grammatical error or that "loving to learn" sounds like an outdated and foolish concept. I'm not sure any of my dear teachers are still around to grade me, but I know their spirits are (pick one) [a] they're [b] their or [c] there.

Life is all multiple choice -- study hard and choose wisely. (Correct answer: C.)

Spay/neuter deals; monsters and music

Scratch a poodle, find a joke.

A couple of days ago I dropped by our usual PetsMart to pick up supplies -- don't ask about the size of that bill! -- and spotted a handsome and quite large black standard poodle being clipped in the groomer's window.

I poked my head in to say "hi" and the groomer told me the poodle is named "Tyson" Then he explained, "They named him Tyson because he likes to nibble your ear."

GETTING AGGRESSIVE: The Metroplex Animal Coalition, the SPCA and the Humane Society of the United States are teaming up to get "aggressive" in a spay-neuter campaign in "specifically targeted areas with the highest number of stray animals," according to a MAC news release.

As you may suspect, one reason dogs and cats go "straying" is that they're interested in "doing what comes naturally." This campaign is designed to reduce that desire. This program will offer free spay-neuter surgeries for all dogs and up to four cats in households of low-income families in 14 Zip Codes. : 75203, 75211, 75212, 75216, 75217, 75224, 75227, 75228, 75232, 75233, 75236, 75237, 75241, 75253.

To qualify, you've got to have a driver's license or utility bill showing you reside in one of the zip codes. Also, this special deal includes a rabies vaccination and post-op pain meds (while neutering is a "clip job," spaying is an invasive surgery).

This program runs through Sept. 1.

To arrange an appointment, call the SPCA Martin Animal Wellness Center, 326 S. Industrial Boulevard, at 214-651-9611, ext. 116 or 133, or the HSUS Spay & Neuter Clinic, I-35 and Ledbetter (4830 Village Fair), at 214-372-9999.

If you know someone who lives in those codes and has a dog or cat that is still breeding, this is the chance to shut off that spigot. This city already kills enough animals -- we don't need more being born just so they can be killed at taxpayer expense. (Visit www.metroplexanimalcoalition.com to see the statistics!)

THE MUSIC MAN: You may have seen an Associated Press obit this week for Jaime Mendoza-Nava, a veteran movie music composer. He died at 79 on May 31 in California, the AP says.

Here's his connection to you: He scored one of the most amazing animal films of all time, The Legend of Boggy Creek, a film about the Bigfoot-like Fouke Monster that is said to wander the woods and bayous in Southwest Arkansas near the Louisiana and Texas borders. I first encountered him in Texarkana in the early 1970s when director Charles B. Pierce, formerly the local TV kid personality known as Mayor Chuckles, proudly hired Mr. Mendoza-Nava to score his Boggy Creek film.

Later he did other movies for Mr. Pierce, including The Town That Dreaded Sundown, the story of the "Phantom Killer" that dispatched several people in my hometown just after World War II. The killer was never caught.

The Phantom Killer disappeared. The Fouke Monster has sort of vanished. And so has director Pierce -- I've been trying to find him for years but the trail has grown cold. I always thought he'd make a good story -- he was one of the more successful regional filmmakers in the country.

You can still, however, hunt the Fouke Monster. Visit Craig Woolheater and his gang at www.texasbigfoot.com. Craig's one of the many people who believe those woods over in the corners of Texas, Arkansas and Louisiana might have some secrets with big feet.

The Texas Bigfoot Research Center's annual conference in Jefferson, Texas, has been scheduled for Oct. 14-16 this year. It would be nifty if both Bigfoot and Charles Pierce showed up. I'd bet on Bigfoot first, though.

COMING UP THIS WEEKEND: The sleeping dog in our "Let Sleeping Dogs Lie/CatNapping" feature is a big fellow named Loki. He lives in Montrose, Colo. You know, at www.readlarrypowell.com we believe that there are photogenic dogs beyond the borders of Dallas County and the State of Texas. Loki proves the point. Catch him this weekend right here.

Dogs, a star, manners & the Mouse

OK, folks, it doesn't take a genius to see that it's hot around here.

But we have some real geniuses who leave animals outside without fresh water or shade throughout searing Texas days.

I'm not sure if chaining a dog to an iron post in the middle of a treeless backyard meets the criteria for "violation of cruelty laws," but it sure as heck ought to and if it doesn't, well, let's start lobbying.

FYI: You may recall that certain areas of West Dallas have always had a problem with "staked-out watchdogs" in lousy weather. The problem continues, but, just so you'll know, there are people who make regular rounds to monitor those animals and make certain they have water and food. Isn't it a shame that good people have to take up the slack for people who seem disinterested once the chain is latched to the dog's neck?

Well, moving along, surely there's some way to remind people to take proper care of their animals during the sizzle season. (Check out www.dogsdeservebetter.com. The national "Chain Off" is coming July 2-4. An unsocialized dog is a dog in trouble -- and a dog that can evolve from a cute puppy to a neighborhood danger.)

I did a Google search for the State of Texas Penal Code and the cruelty statutes. Section 42.09 shows that a "person commits an offense if he intentionally or knowingly ... fails unreasonably to provide necessary food, shelter or care" for an animal. If you're convicted of this, you could get a fine of up to $4,000, a year in jail or both, the statute says.

Of course, speeding and murder are against the law and that doesn't slow anybody down, so, well, you know what cynics expect from the cream of the human crop.

JUST THINKING: Ron Chapman is winding down his on-air career at KLUV (98.7 FM) after -- well, I can't remember how many years but it seems to me he was the radio voice of the first Serpent Roundup in the Garden of Eden and, later, spun the stacks of wax in the disco on Noah's Yacht. All these years that he's been on the air, people have been listening to him. Listening to him.

The City of Dallas owes him something -- a parade, a statue or something. He's one of the few enduring personalities around here who made a big positive national splash for Dallas and didn't wind up in a staggeringly sad scandal (no steroids, no late-night coke-and-cutie parties with the Cowboys, etc.)

Why have people listened to him? Because he made people part of his show -- he'd be in a studio, you'd be in a car stuck on LBJ or the old Central Expressway and he'd be right there with you. If he was paying attention to demographics and idiot focus groups, you couldn't tell it.

Remember that time in 1988 that he asked people to send in $20 bills without telling them why? They trusted him so much they sent it in by the stacks and stacks -- more than $200,000 as I recall. He gave it to area charities. He knew the heart of his audience -- the folks in the audience knew him.

Heck, Ron just turned on the microphone and gave you something to listen to that wasn't shrill or insistent or calculated to tick people off for the sake of ratings.

Those of us who grew up listening to AM radio in the '50s and '60s recall when DJs spun platters, announced the artists, gave us the weather, chatted briefly about the local activities that we were all part of -- they simultaneously created and reflected a sense of community. I think, maybe, it was a formula that worked if you believed your audience wasn't a bunch of nameless doofuses just waiting to have their pockets picked.

If Ron really retires, I guess we'll all have to follow the lead of current talk radio and choose up sides and scream at each other.

CALL IT ACTING! OR ACTING UP! The legendary Diane Arrington of PetPerfect Academy says the school is looking for dog people and their dogs to appear in a videotape that'll be used by the academy.

Here's the deal: "If you live in Dallas and have a dog with behavior problems (jumping on visitors, running out the front door, destructive chewing, getting on countes or in the trash, stealing objects or food, not paying attention to commands, etc.), counseling in your home would normally cost around $600. If you agree to take part in our video, you will receive a complete behavior modification program in your home at no charge to you."

See the rules and the needs at www.petperfect.com/are_you_camera.htm. (They're picking just five dogs and their people. Call 972-484-8882 to set up a phone interview.)

We have a 50-or-60-pound puppy with a set of legs long as a foal's who has taken to stretching onto the kitchen counter and pulling off anything -- anything. So far we've tried shouting at her, talking sternly, petting her, tsk-tsking her, handing her a cease-and-desist order from the court, etc. The lure of the counter is too strong, however.

Annie thinks her name is "Anniegetdown."

SHOW BIZ DISCOUNT: Disney's On The Record show, a collection of 64 "hits" from the Big Mouse's movies and musicals, is about to open at the Dallas Summer Musicals. It'll run June 21-July 3 in the Fair Park Music Hall and, if you have a hankerin' to see it at a whopping discount, one is available for all shows except Friday and Saturday nights. The official notice says there's a "50 percent discount on price levels 3-9. Offer good on tickets purchased at The Box Office [542 Preston Royal Shopping Center], www.ticketmaster.com and charge-by-phone [214-631-ARTS]." And what is the "reference password" when you seek this discount? It is, no kidding, "MOUSE." (Check out the show info at www.dallassummermusicals.org.)

Outside of "Minnie's Yoo-Hoo" from 1930's The Shindig, the oldest songs in the show, if I read the summary correctly, are from 1937's Snow White. And there are songs from The Jungle Book, The Parent Trap and other shows that Disney put together before the world was taken over by extravaganzas, i.e The Lion King. Modern-era Disney songs are in the show, too.

If you want to see it in a real theater, see it now. By next year it'll probably be touring big sports palaces as "Disney Chills The Mouse! On The Record On Ice."

Yesterday and the future

So, the Collin County Grand Jury declined to indict the guy accused of dropping a box of live kittens into a creek and drowning them.

Grand jury testimony is secret, so those of us outside the room will never know how the testimony really went. But, we do know the SPCA says a witness says she heard kittens mewing in the box as it floated out-of-reach after she saw the guy drop it off the bridge.

If the kittens weren't alive, why didn't the guy just bury 'em on his property, or bag 'em and put 'em where he puts all his other trash? Or have a vet dispose of them? Or -- well, geez, why would you drop a box of DEAD kittens in a creek? And isn't that against some environmental law?

Or do I need to consult my Texas judicial map -- am I to understand that, at this time, Collin County is now in California?

WONDERING? Do you ever wonder what kind of dogs wind up in the "foster" list for A Different Breed?

Here are two currently on the list:

Dosco is a male Shepherd mix who "was abused in his last home and not fed well or bathed. He has a rash, allergy or some skin condition. ... He is about 10 months old. Not house-trained. He loves walks. He is also very playful. He is still a pup so he likes to chew. .... He is great with other dogs. He was neglected so all he wants is love." (Dosco appears to be auditioning for a role as "chagrined husband in custody" sitting in the backseat of a squad car on TV's Cops. But, I'm sure he's just acting! He has the look of a fellow who could be a buddy given half the chance.)

Bell is a "gentle, mellow-tempered female terrier mix that is 1-2 years old. She has white, short hair with a pink under-skin tone, sorta piggy looking...very cute! She weighs about 40 pounds." This dog is good with kids and other animals but may have been abused--she's timid until she warms up to adults. Needs to be spayed, of course. She appears to be ready to listen -- at least with one ear! With some dogs, that's all we can hope for.

If you want to help with either or both of these dogs, call 214-957-7872.

FALL PLANNING: The ol' hound dog himself, Elvis, is going to be featured in a new exhibit at the State Fair of Texas -- it runs Sept. 30-Oct. 23 (www.bigtex.com) and, for you artsy types, you can get the 2005 Creative Arts Competition Handbook now, too. Ah, nothing tastes quite so wonderful as the contest entries in the State Fair of Texas cooking contests. Outside of the Midway food, of course (I don't want to be blasphemous.) ...

While you're still making a note of that, let me remind you that Stratos Restaurant's Second Annual Mutt Masquerade is Oct. 22 -- it's a great event with costumes, fine dining, etc., benefiting Operation Kindness. Dawn Rizos of Stratos has even arranged for the top prize to be (just like last year) a trip for 2 to the Westminster Dog Show in February. How about that! (As I recall, last year's winner shouted for joy!) ...

On Nov. 6, you can help Operation Kindness by attending the annual Canines, Cats & Cabernet wine-tasting and silent auction -- this year it'll be at the Infomart. More later. ...

And, keep your good party duds sparkly because on Nov. 13, you can attend the Paws Cause fundraiser benefiting the Dallas Spay/Neuter and Animal Wellness Clinic (that's at I-35 and Ledbetter in Oak Cliff.). More on this later, but in case you wondered, the event will be at Ciudad Restaurant, 3888 Oaklawn Ave. The event chair is Gigi Potter. Honorary Chairs are Cheryl and Sam Wylie -- they are the people who contributed the big matching grant to the Metroplex Animal Coalition's Patt Davis Spay/Neuter Fund earlier this year. My funspouse Martha and I had lunch last week with the event's PR titan, Karol Wilson. She's excited about the big fund-raising soiree.

Martha and I were at the clinic the day it opened years ago. We've even had a bundle of feral cats "fixed" there. They seem to have survived the experience quite happily. Beg pardon? Yes, a "bundle of feral cats." You can't really call them a litter and you can't really call them a flock, but if you don't figure out a way to "bundle" them, you sure can call them "gone in a split second."

A genuine potpourri and big ears, too

As we wonder what Michael Jackson is doing today and if attorney Tom Mesereau is about to be the proud owner of the Lennon-McCartney song catalogue, let's get on with our own lives.

REMINDER: If you are an animal group, a rescue group, a shelter or a person who supports those things and you have an event scheduled for July or August, now is the time to send your announcements to [email protected] for inclusion in the popular monthly magazine, Urban Animal. It's free ink. FREE ink. About the only things rescue groups pick up free are puppies and kittens -- they may be free, but sometimes they come with a price tag.

THE VIGIL IS COMING: Coming up Aug. 20, according to spokeswoman Kim Polen, the 2005 North Texas Homeless Animals' Candlelight Vigil. It'll be from 6 p.m. to 9 p.m. at the Carrollton Amphitheater (on Jackson Road, east of Josey Lane and south of 190.) If you want to be a vendor, have a rescue booth or be involved in some other way, e-mail [email protected].

The theme of the evening -- and may I say it's high time -- is "Volunteering: An Inspired Endeavor." Among the speakers will be Jay Sabatucci from the Humane Society of the United States and, from Urban Animal and this website, me. That's right. It's not a political year, so other than Jay they can't get a real dignitary -- nobody needs votes this fall so I'll make a speech. And I'm not running for anything -- yet. though I have pinpointed some issues. I'm kidding.

By the way, Enid Breakstone, whose Queenie Foundation ramrodded this thing for its first nine years, has moved to Connecticut but left part of her heart here and is interested in the legacy of the vigil. This year, The Queenie Foundation is the coordinator and is running things "in association" with Treasured Friends No-Kill Animal Rescue.

My funspouse Martha will probably be there praying for a cool breeze and a husband who speaks briefly.

EARLY NOTICE: At 11:35 p.m. Monday, a springtime evening (summer starts June 21) I saw the first sign of autumn: Channel 11 (KTVT) ran a commercial for Criminal Minds "this fall on CBS." It'll star Mandy Patinkin as "Gideon." One of his co-stars is Thomas Gibson, formerly Greg of Dharma and Greg. He plays "Hotch." Gideon and Hotch. You think CBS uses a focus group to name characters?

WHOSE EARS ARE THOSE? Last week in this space you saw some dynamic ears on a coonhound. one of the competitors at the Operation Kindness Dog Day Afternoon. (My shutterspouse Martha snapped that photo.)

Here's the ID on that dog courtesy of the proud doggie mom, Gail Rushing. "My dog is the one referred to as the 'long-eared rascal'. She is indeed long-eared. Sophie is a Black and Tan Coonhound that came into our rescue (I am a foster mom for Black & Tans) and I just fell in love with her and adopted her myself.

"This, of course, breaks all kinds of rules that fosters make for themselves about adding more to the household." (You can check out adopting and fostering and helping these dogs at www.coonhoundrescue.com.)

Sophie didn't triumph in the Dog Day Afternoon ears contest (a Basset with ears as long as "razor strops," to evoke barbering of yesteryear, won). But Sophie has made a name for herself in a sixth grade class at Akiba Academy. (This photo is courtesy of Gail.)

Gail says, "The students had been reading Where the Red Fern Grows and their teacher wanted them to meet actual coonhounds. Sophie and two foster puppies were quite a hit and we have a standing invitation to come back every year."

As for chasing a Frisbee, Gail says that "unless she can tree it, Sophie just isn't interested."

THE SQUEAKY HEEL GETS THE PIZZA: Friday night my funspouse Martha and I had a date -- we try to go out at least one weekend night as if we were teenagers (which one of us is not -- by a longshot).

So we went to a pizza and pasta place, Sam's in Cedar Hill. It's one of our favorite spots. (You actually run into animal people there -- a few weeks back we saw Colleen FitzGerald, the mom of Chance the famous show-dog Samoyed, having a quiet meal with hubby Jim.)

This time, my datespouse and I were sitting there enjoying our pizza when a cacophony of squeakiness began emanating from a table near the back wall and filling the restaurant with dog-toy-like squeaks. Really, it was more like a dog toy factory testing room. Squeak, Squeak, Squeak until your ears began to quiver. The squeaks were relentless -- like that episode of Cheers where Cliff orders new squeaky shoes for everyone and Norm finally says, "Cliffy. Make it stop." That squeaky.

We couldn't figure out what it was at first, but we noticed we were not the only folks wincing in the onslaught. What was squeaking? We finally realized the squeaks were coming from kid shoes. Two little girls had some brand new slip-on shoes that had squeaky things built into the plastic heels so that every time they took a step, their feet squeaked. They were enjoying taking a lot of steps.

While their adults talked, the kids ran around the table and down the aisles and squeaked like bad springs in a mattress factory. Eventually they left. Loved the girls, hated the shoes!

I thought for a second they might get a standing ovation for walking out -- but I've become an old goat about kids. On the other hand, maybe children should be seen and their feet not heard.

Those shoes are probably cool on the playground, at the pool or on the lake. I don't know. The kids were having fun and they were nice. Except for that squeaking.

I'm sure there's a special place for the guy who invented those shoes. And I'll bet it's not at a quiet table, but it is close to a fireplace.

Old friends, new projects

This dog's countenance proves the old line about a picture being worth a thousand words. She is simultaneously fearful and just flat beaten down -- it is the look of a dog who has spent too much time in a shelter and too little time in the arms of someone who might love her.

There are dogs like this all over the world, I guess. They've spent too much time in a shelter waiting for someone to stop by and love them.  Could this dog ever be frisky again? We'll tell her story in a little bit. Some of you may wish to get a tissue. Please read on:

THE PRAYING COP: One evening last week we stopped in for a meal at a Duncanville cafeteria. As my buffetspouse Martha and I found our ways to a table, I noticed that a Duncanville cop had seated himself in an out-of-the-way booth and before diving into his grub, was offering a silent prayer. I'm pretty sure the food's not that dangerous. Seriously, I guess it sort of struck me that an officer would take a moment to pray. I don't know what he was praying for, but if it was for safety and wisdom in doing his job, he's probably due a chorus of "amens." Being a good cop is a staggeringly tough job -- there are so many people who aren't all that interested in being good citizens.

DISTRESSED DOGS: Here's a note from Gail Whelan of the Companion Animal Network. It's disturbing, but there's hope because there are so many people who care for animals. Gail writes:

"I am hoping that somehow the city and other rescue groups and animal advocates can help with an entire family of dogs living on a lot near Ferguson and Oates Drive. I have been told that the adults dogs were dumped sometime last fall. There were intially three, but one was killed. There are now two adult female dogs. I have seen six puppies. I found one puppy dead--hit by a car.

"These dogs are NOT pit bull. We are going back to try to take pictures of these dogs to pass around. ...There are too many for me to try to trap or help on my own. I am continuing to leave food and water. I am very worried about their welfare and the fact that the puppies will continue to breed."

But, here's the twist: Gail spent the weekend trying to find these dogs. All trace of them had vanished from the lot -- even the food dishes. So, now, if you know what has happened to these dogs, please let other would-be rescuers know. E-mail [email protected].

The fact that people are trying to help the dogs almost outweighs the fact that there were people who didn't lift a finger to help them. Almost. We humans will have a lot to answer for when the roll is called up yonder.

CALLING A GEEK: Maybe this section should be labeled "CALLING AN ANIMAL-FRIENDLY GEEK." Our friends at the Metroplex Animal Coalition need help maintaining the website, according to tipster Rebecca Poling. "We currently have a fabulous webmaster who will remain involved, but constraints on her time, combined with increasing demand for updates, mean she can't continue to handle it all alone. If you would like to help MAC, have html experience and/or are proficient with Go-Live, please contact [email protected]."

One of the great things about that MAC site is it's a good spot to find out about the Patt Davis Memorial Spay/Neuter Fund -- a solidly good way to get animals fixed. Pass the info on to your friends who need the financial break.

I swear, if you can't get your dog or cat fixed in this town, you're just not trying. And so many people aren't trying that I'm ready to swear.

TWO AUTUMNAL PLAN-AHEADS: Put these things on your calendar or contact the groups to help!

The recent Arists for Animals event at Iris Restaurant was a success for MAC, reports Rebecca Poling. (Word is Iris makes a great Bellini, but, of course, everyone was there for the art. Honest!) This was, of course, Artists for Animals Part I (featuring works by Jimmy Ellis and Rich Poling) and it drew a nice crowd. Coming up Sunday Sept. 18, 5-8 p.m., at Ozona Grill in Dallas, Arists for Animals Part II, featuring TEN artists -- tickets are $35. E-mail [email protected] to ask questions or to help with the event in some way. We'll keep you posted on developments.

Coming Saturday Oct. 1 to Bridlewood Golf Club in Flower Mound, Companion Animal Networks "First Annual Mutt Putt Charity Golf tournament." More info to come on that, too. They need 20 teams -- if you've got a team already, e-mail [email protected] and sign up early. They might also still be looking for corporate-style prizes for the duffers, er, golfers. So if you have some charitable donations to make, e-mail the same address and volunteer. Sometimes you have to shoot birdies and eagles to help dogs and cats.

THE STORY OF THE DOG: Yes, Ember the Dog had one "sad sack" countenance when, on behalf of the rescue group, A Different Breed, we published that sad-looking photo on Jan. 11. Ember had been in Dallas' Forney Road Animal Shelter for a while and was depressed -- it showed in her demeanor. She also was at peril -- the city shelters aren't set up to keep every dog and cat forever. Her ADB description read, "She is a 3-4 year old black lab mix who looks like she has on some tan booties around her paws. She weighs 73 lbs. You look into those eyes and it seems she is remembering days gone by and memories of the good ol days....Do you think you can give those to her again!?”

On Jan. 21, we got word that Claudia and Sean Randall, after seeing Ember's photo, had driven up from Houston to adopt her.

A few days ago, Claudia sent this message to Becky Haisma with A Different Breed. "We adopted Ember from the Forney Road Animal Shelter back in January and just wanted to send you another picture. She looks really happy in this one. Please tell the folks at Forney that Ember is still doing wonderfully." And, Claudia writes, there's a chance that she and her hubby will soon "take another road trip to Dallas to find a playmate for Miss Ember!"

And, look at the "now" photo! Ember obviously is thriving. Dogs make us happy, but, by golly, sometimes we make dogs happy, too! Bless everybody involved in this happy adoption. It's good to see that there are people who realize that these big ol' dawgs can turn out to be the best friends you'd ever want. And, if you're wondering, Becky says A Different Breed can help you find one of these "desperate to go home" dogs.

Warming a Sleeping Weenie Dog

Something about this photo struck me first as "funny" then as "warm." And I think "warm" is exactly how Duke The Dachshund sees it when he's awake. In this photo, he's sawin' logs, catching some Z's, watching the backs of his eyelids -- and all in a very comfy set-up.

His mom, Laura Tillison, explains, "He is quite happy sleeping in his heated bed with a blanket wrapped around him.

"Duke is about six years old, a rescue I adopted from Houston Dachshund Rescue three years ago. He shares his home with another Dachshund, Chloe, and a terrier-mix named Barney."

They live with Laura and her husband, Randy, in Mesquite.

Of all the people in the household, Laura says, "Only Duke insists on having a heated bed --- which was a great investment!"

Feel free to make up your own punchlines about "hot dog."

Reminder: We're happy to spotlight your sleeping dog or your napping cat in our once-a-weekend feature. It's no challenge to snap a cute photo when they're awake, but when they're sleeping it takes some skill--you have to be able "sneak" the camera out and "sneak up" on the critter and then snap the photo without disturbing your napping model. Sometimes that's hard to do. Send your sleeper shots to [email protected].

VIEWING TIPS: We're told Channel 11 (more formally "CBS 11") will re-run Mattie Roberts' story on Operation Kindness during the 8 a.m. newscast on Saturday. ... At 6 p.m. Sunday, if the NBC schedule isn't disrupted, Al Roker will host "Pet Nation" (part of Dateline NBC). It'll feature interviews with President and Mrs. Bush and their Scotties, Barney and Miss Beazley, and India the Cat. Other prominent pet people are on the show, too. ... At 2 a.m. Sunday, Poirot, our tuxedo cat, will knock the remote control and some DVDs off the top of the television. It's not scheduled. Just a prediction based on previous weekend behavior.

Some odd news, some good news

This has been an interesting week in the animal kingdom.

In the non-profit arena, the SPCA was under attack. In the taxpayer arena, people are realizing Dallas has handed the new animal shelter supporters a card reading, "Please take a number and wait." The twice-voted-for, long-awaited new animal shelter is in an expensive stall -- construction prices never go down as time goes by.

(You may have read about that 60 percent overshooting of the budget on June 8 in the general press, but you read it first here on May 23. Still, it's just as unbelievable in June as it was in May that there's a big flopping foul up of some kind. Once again, the city can't pull the trigger on a good and decent project. Of course, an animal shelter is merely a "quality of life" issue, not a quality of a sports team owners' pocketbook issue or a behind-closed-doors tax abatement issue. An animal shelter is only dealing with lives, not dollars. Heck, why build a shelter when we can just put 'em in a towsack and toss 'em into a creek, right? Solve the problem the medieval way -- put the effluence of life into a creek and hope for a gullywasher.)

Fortunately, throughout the whole big stressful mess, we have people who keep rescuing animals, doing their jobs, living up to the volunteer code of "keep on going." If Dallas had not been blessed with vigorous, strong-minded volunteers in the animal community, there's no telling what the local kill rate would be. Lord knows there's a ton of geniuses in this town who haven't been able to grasp the concept of spay/neuter.

THAT SPCA THING: People have been steamed and simmering over that ABC 20/20 report a week ago about various SPCA groups and their alleged methods of "rescue." (See www.spca.org.)

Frankly, the suggestion that anybody rescues dogs and cats for fun and profit is so asinine as to be laughable. But the reality is there are folks who have philosophical differences with the SPCA -- that's why, I guess, there are no-kill shelters and other rescue groups. The good thing is, they're all trying to help animals. I'm not so sure about those folks who keep 30 dogs in a five dog pen or 60 cats in a bedroom without food and water.

And, honestly, nobody can deny that the SPCA staffers and volunteers work hard to adopt out animals. There's a lot of integrity at the SPCA.

In all my time in journalism (and that's going back to 1965) I can't remember the SPCA of Texas losing a custody hearing in one of these confiscation raids. It may have happened but it's got to be rare as a microchipped stray in my neighborhood.

I can, however, remember seeing reports and photos of lots of abused, sick, ignored and desperate animals being removed from squalid conditions.

No, I didn't see the 20/20 show, so I can't comment on specifics. And I don't travel with the SPCA cruelty investigators. But I do know that there are unscrupulous breeders and there are "collectors" who lose track of things and wind up harming the animals they love.

Here's an irony: When we should have all been celebrating the SPCA's PetFlix festival last Saturday, there was a bit of a pall because of the 20/20 report.

My funspouse Martha and I -- invited to help judge the festival -- spent part of last weekend with SPCA director James Bias and other SPCA personnel at Lakewood Theater watching PetFlix finalists. It was a wonderful show -- there wasn't a clunker in the whole bunch of movies. I hope that, at some point, these films will be available on a website for people to see.

My insightfulspouse Martha has a take on this SPCA controversy. She says that "when trying to tell the good guys from the bad guys, it's always a good idea to examine motive." The motive of the staffers and volunteers at the SPCA, she says, "is simple: animal welfare. And they are on the side of the angels."

BIG SALE: You can't operate a rescue group without some coin. So, the Safer Stray and Feral Rescue folks are hosting their first garage sale from 8 a.m. to 5 p.m. Saturday at 11907 Quincy Lane in Dallas. That's off Forest between Preston and Inwood near the Dallas North Tollway -- in other words, there's easy access to this sale, so feel free to stop by and shop until you need help lifting things into the trunk of your car. It's going for a good cause, says Sharold Prather, the SAFER spokesperson.

THE GREYHOUNDS CELEBRATE: The Greyhound Adoption League of Texas must be celebrating again! The Fourth Annual Greyt Athletes Benefit Dinner & Auction is "sold out," according to the rescue group's website, www.greyhoundadoptiontx.org.

It's scheduled for 7 p.m. Monday at Lawry's The Prime Rib on Dallas Parkway. There'll be all sorts of sports celebrities there. Tickets were $100 each and they sold only 120 of them. Proceeds from the dinner and auction go to helping the retired greyhound athletes find better lives. And, as greyhound fans know, when you see one of these speedy dogs racing somewhere, they are, in reality, probably just running toward the nearest couch.

Buddy, Daisy and a horse bill

We've got ourselves a summertime potpourri today -- some of it is good news, some of it is a dog story awaiting a happy ending.

But, first, as we await a verdict in the Michael Jackson case, I've just seen a TV commercial for a cell phone service that will call you immediately when the jury comes back with a verdict. Remember when cell phones were for things like calling you to let you know someone's baby was arriving or for calling for help when you had a blowout?

Here is a truth: The most constant thing on earth is change.

BUDDY'S TALE: You may recall the story of a couple of weeks ago in this cyberspace. Lougay Toles ran into an East Dallas grocery store for a few minutes after walking her Yorkie Buddy. She left Buddy in the car in his usually spot. Someone took Buddy out of the car. Lougay was terribly upset.

Lougay went sleuthing and observing. She put up signs. She did everything a heartbroken person would do, including beating herself up for having left Buddy in the car. She called Joe Cranford at Find-a-Pet (www.find-a-pet.org ; call 214-827-4357) and enlisted that free service in the hunt for Buddy. She called this website and we talked for a while about her beloved Buddy and how he got to her house after being picked up matted and starving off the side of a road near Austin.

Last weekend, after a few phone calls back and forth with a stranger, Lougay got Buddy back on the same parking lot where he'd disappeared. It was a negotiated return. Buddy had been taken by one or more "well-meaning dog-rescuers" who thought he was in peril. The story is, I'm told, they read the story of Buddy on this website and realized Buddy was a deeply loved dog. So arrangements were made and Buddy was returned without any cash changing hands or any further stress.

Lots of people learned lessons in this episode. Some of us will be more careful about leaving our dogs in cars; some of us will be more careful about rescuing such dogs. The police have enough to worry about without having to chase down and arrest good-hearted people who stepped over a line while, in their perception, they were trying to save a life.

You can figure, that sometimes there are better ways to save an animal than stealing it -- sometimes. There also are people who defy logic by defiantly mistreating their animals. There are laws that apply to them, too.

So, thankfully, Buddy was taken in by people who cared for him -- and mercifully he's been returned to someone who adores him.

After she got Buddy back, Lougay says, "I literally collapsed for three days. We both did. ... I am the happiest lady in the Metroplex."

DAISY IS MISSING: Carla Long is suffering through some distress. Her year-old, purebred American Pit Bull Terrier Daisy is missing from her West Dallas home in the Westmoreland at Singleton area.

Carla says, "She is solid white with a red nose. She has a left blue eye and a right green eye. She weighs approximately 65-70 pounds and is very friendly. Hear ears and tail are not cropped. ... My greatest fear is that she has been abducted for fighting purposes. If you know the wherebouts of Daisy or have some suggestions for finding her, e-mail [email protected] or call 817-713-4678 or 817-615-2647.

"I just lost my Shih-Tzu of 18 years," Carla says, "and Daisy has helped fill my aching heart. I don't know what I will do without her. She is like my daughter."

HORSES: When I went to work at the late, lamented tabloid Fort Worth Press in the early 1970s, one of the first stories I covered was an attempt to shut down a horseslaughter plant in Tarrant County. Foolish me thought this issue would be settled in time for the Bicentennial in 1976. The plant survives to this day.

Now, more than three decades later, legislation may finally end this practice of turning horses into meals for people with bad taste. The U.S. House has passed the Agriculture Appropriations Spending Bill and it includes an amendment that -- unless there's a loophole nobody's spotted -- will end the practice of killing horses so they can be sent to Europe and Asia for human consumption. You may recall that last year it was revealed that, recently, 1986 Kentucky Derby winner Ferdinand had been sent to a slaughterhouse in Japan. Good grief, is that sad or what?

The horse-saving bill now goes to the Senate. You can find your senator at www.senate.gov if you wish to let your senator know how you feel about this issue.

A bird, a law, a dog & The Producers

There was some racket at our place about 2 a.m. From the back of the house I could hear the low growl of a cat in a bad mood.

So, already committed to a few hours of insomnia, I got up to see what was in the works and as I stumbled down the hall I realized that the throaty growl was coming not from inside the house but from the front porch.

Gently opening the door, I saw Ol' Doc White, one of our three feral cats, having a face-off with a big raccoon over a bowl of cat food. Doc was not in the mood to share his grub with a masked bandit. And, when I opened the door to step outside, the raccoon waddled off the porch and into the night.

Keep in mind that this was 2 a.m. Raccoons, some cats and a few humans are nocturnal. But one thing I noticed was that from a tree near the driveway, there were either 30 or 40 birds singing different songs or one crazy mockingbird doing a rendition of "A Chorus of Birds Tweet Madly in the Night." I don't know if birds are supposed to be up singing at the tops of their little lungs at 2 in the morning, but this one was putting on quite a shrill show. I thought they usually waited until sunrise to sing, but, as the Mockingbird mockingly trilled toward the insomniac, "Look, buddy, it's sunrise somewhere."

LEGISLATION: If you want to stop the slaughter of horses for sale as human food, you have a chance today. We hear from folks who keep up with these things that the Sweeney-Spratt amendment to the agriculture appropriations bill needs some support to end this practice of killing horses for consumption overseas. Here's a link:

https://community.hsus.org/campaign/sweeney_amendment

If memory serves, the only two plants in the U.S. that slaughter horses for human consumption are in Texas -- one in Fort Worth, one in Kaufman County.

THE DOG THAT WANDERED UP: A couple of days ago I posted a notice about seeking help for a dog that had wandered up to Lisa Carrigan's house. The family already had a couple of dogs and wanted to make sure this dog found a good home.

Seems like the dog charmed its way into a good home. Here's the report from Lisa: "I wanted to give you an update on the Australian Shepherd stray. He is enjoying long walks on a leash, the comfort of air-conditioning in the summer and lots of love and attention. We have decided to keep 'Buster' and to weather through the heartworm treatment he will have in the near future. Thanks for your help in trying to help us."

Now, folks, this is a noble thing and it boosts the spirit to know this dog and these people have formed a mutual admiration society.

I hope they win the lottery.

AND NOW, A REVIEW OF A BIG SHOW: I saw the Dallas Summer Musicals version of The Producers Tuesday night. I'm meeting with a lawyer this afternoon.

Relax. The events are not connected.

Oh, my, maybe it was where I was sitting at the Fair Park Music Hall, a mere 22 expensive seats from the front and on the right side of the theater. Maybe that was the "dead zone" for the expensive speakers. Watching the show was, most of the time, like listening to an AM radio station that isn't quite tuned precisely to the signal -- you know someone is singing, but you can't make out the words. Maybe I'm working with a bad set of post-middle-aged ears, but, I tell ya, the sound was awful. Lyrics and dialogue were just not clear. (I asked around. I was not alone.)

Maybe it was just a case of the opening night mikes not working right for the three big players. I won't name them. It may not have been their fault. Having been on stage myself and been betrayed by either myself or my expectations, I'm always willing to cut the actors some slack.

The sets were great, the lighting was great, some of the songs work, some of them aren't enchanting, nobody should ever write a roller coaster soprano Swedish accent into the dialogue of a play at any point. Too shrill to understand. The leads were a tad worn from the long haul, I suspect.

The guy playing Max Bialystock couldn't decide whether he was channeling Nathan Lane, Zero Mostel or some guy he once saw tap-dancing to an imaginary orchestra in an asylum shower. The guy playing Leo Bloom took a good shot a it. The woman who played Ulla was actually in the original company of The Producers on Broadway -- according to the program -- but, honest, she must have had a better sound system in New York.  And that rollercoaster Swedish accent she cartooned across the crowd was impossible to understand and more grating than nails on a blackboard.

It was a good audience, however. They applauded lots of stuff.

(Even when the lights came up before the show started, there was a smattering of applause from one mid-house area -- typical Dallas, applauding light. You could have pigs performing Shakespeare and a Dallas audience would declare it to be the "best Hamlet ever" as they stood to press for an encore. Heck, I once saw a Dallas audience wildly applauds the scrim that dropped across the stage during the opening of Porgy & Bess. Ironically, sometimes little theaters with great productions can't pay people to come to their shows. Why is that? Shortcoming in the audience? Perhaps. I ran into a guy I knew at last night's show. I explained that our tickets were a gift. He said his wife got two free when she went to a movie over the weekend. Gasp. Did they have to paper the house for The Producers? Well, there were "Broadway names" in the cast, but no names we'd know in the "states between the coasts.")

Look, it was opening night. Maybe this group of actors had never worked together at the Music Hall before and didn't know the tricks of the house. Maybe they weren't accustomed to being miked the way they were miked. Maybe the sound people aimed the speakers the wrong way or maybe someone pilfered the tweeters and hijacked the woofers. Or maybe the treble and bass ran away with the spoon.

Still, it's a show that has its moments: Never thought I'd write this sentence, but Hitler is great. Both of them -- the guy who writes the fictional musical "Springtime for Hitler" and the guy who stars in it. And the guy who plays Carmen Ghia is great -- his mike seems to work just fine, his enunciation is primo. I could understand the lyrics when he sang and spoke. But he didn't sing that many songs. Still, I'm pretty sure it was a sound system problem -- like the mikes didn't match the voices, perhaps. Or, if the mikes were custom modulated for the different voices, someone pulled a backstage prank and switched them around. Hardee-har-har.

OK, enough. You get the drift. The Producers: Good show, so-so opening night production and a wish that, if you have to see it again, you hope you can hear all the lame jokes Mel Brooks wrote into the show. Which reminds me, one of the highlights is the tap-dancing old babes with aluminum walkers. Funny to watch. Couldn't grasp the lyrics -- I'm sure it's a problem with my stirrup and anvil though I'm also certain I heard other people in my section going, "What'd he say?"

There are jokes about gays, a joke about a black guy, jokes about chubby women, jokes about geriatrics, jokes about Hitler...Something that should offend everyone at some point. Some of them I heard. But I should be able to forget them. It's not like I haven't heard this stuff before in lesser productions or, sadly, in real life.

This production of The Producers -- it's worth seeing -- is in town through June 19, then, as they say, the show must go on. In this case, it must go on to Japan to finish the tour, according to the national Producers website and I hope the sound works there. Maybe there'll be translators.

(Explanatory note: Though I was never paid to be a drama critic in my long, long newspaper career, I have written many reviews of productions. This was another one. I present it as a public service to remind people on budgets that in the big halls sometimes it's not the line-of-sight you should be concerned with, but the line of earshot. And if I'd heard that unfunny Swedish accent one more time, I'd have lined up my own ears and shot them.)